[No open reaction so far. Kazuya was eyeing William with open nervousness, but he felt a bit hopeful now. He could detect a bit of annoyance, but overall, William's response was... favourable? Well, better than back home, where he'd end up having a lynch mob running after him a la Midori's situation]
I was thinking about it a lot recently. In my world, demons are not... viewed nicely. I mean, it makes sense. Almost all demons are violent, horrible creatures who deserve to die.
[Something dark flickered through Kaz's expression then, though it cleared quickly as he heaved a loud sigh]
So, I don't tell people because... you know, they... they get scared or, try to kill me, or something. So, it's easier to pretend that I'm human. But, recently, um, some people found out and they haven't... reacted badly? It's nice when people know and still like me, s-so, I've decided to be honest to my friends and tell them!
[He actually looked at William now, looking both horribly nervous yet determined. The cat was out of the bag! If William accepted him, then, Kazuya knew that he could be less wound up about his whole demon issue. That, maybe, when he got back home, there was a chance Yuzu and Atsuro would look at him without that slight trace of fear in their eyes, if he worked hard enough!]
I'm a demon and I'm sorry for lying! [He bent forwards in a deep bow of apology] Please forgive me!
[William took it all in. It made sense of course, that people would not like demons. Hadn't he had a million horrifying experiences with them? And at the same time...
He could also remember the look on Dantalion's face whenever someone called him Nephilim with disgust. He could remember seeing through Solomon's eyes when he had first met Camio, rejected by everyone because of what he was.
Wasn't this the same in a way? And Kazuya had never wanted anything from him. To him Solomon was a nobody. But he also understood what it was like when people didn't see you either. He might very well be the only person William met whoever would understand.]
Very well, you are a demon then. I will admit, it fills me with no pleasure to find that out...
[Okay that was not a nice start, but he was coming up with something better.]
But, you are what you are. There is no helping that. And you haven't lied to me otherwise that I know of.
[Not about anything major anyways. Small lies were natural things.]
But, I will forgive you, providing you come in here and stop lurking near the window like a criminal.
[Kazuya straightened up when William finished speaking, and didn't immediately move. Instead he was staring at William with an expression of mild disbelief mingled with utter relief, and... ah, did he look a bit teary-eyed there...?]
Uh, ah... yes, of course! Lurking, uh, I'll come in, then.
[He shuffled deeper into the apartment, almost tripping over his own feet. He practically flopped in the armchair opposite to William, and he was still looking at the human like he still couldn't quite believe what had just happened.
There was a thought that crawled into his mind, to say, "ah, but you haven't told him that demons in your world need to eat humans", but he squashed it flat. One thing at a time. He'll... tell him that later. Kazuya was going to be selfish for once, so... he wasn't going to sabotage himself again!]
T-Thank you, William. Like, it means... it means a lot to me, that you... [He fidgeted with his sleeve, giving a small, suspicious sniff] I'm glad we're still friends?
Of course we are. Otherwise I wouldn't have asked you inside.
[He looked at Kazuya as he draped on the couch, like some poor stray. The look being completed by the near tears.]
Even if I had been angry at you, that doesn't mean you would have stopped being my friend.
[He's forgiven worse. One just has to look at his relationship with Kevin and how it had changed. William hadn't even thought the two of them could still have a relationship after that reveal. And yet here they were, still together, their friendship stronger than ever.]
Besides, you have nothing to gain from being near me. That much I trust, because you are frankly a terrible liar.
[Despite the somewhat sulky tone he took at that (true) comment about his lying skills, he was smiling. He felt like he was going to float off towards the stratosphere or something. Minny believed in him, William believed in him, Hyoubu believed in him... maybe retaining his humanity wasn't such an impossibility after all...]
I'm just too pure-hearted to lie, is all. It's morally wrong or... something like that. Yeah.
[No one is too pure hearted to lie. But well that's the nature of the beast that is called humanity. Humanity, demons, angels and everything that had the mental capacitiy for moral reasoning.
But now wasn't the time to get philosophical in his head.]
[Kaz shuffled in his seat like a scolded schoolboy, twiddling his thumbs together at that question. Kevin... Kevin...]
Well, not exactly. [He looked uncomfortable] He knows there's something not quite... right, with me, but, he, um, doesn't know that I'm actually a demon. He thinks I'm possessed... which is half-true too, I guess, since Abel's still rocking about inside me. But, yeah. He doesn't fully know.
[He knew how Kevin felt about demons. Even when it had been to save someone like Baphomet, he had balked. William had been forced to guilt him into it.]
I will make sure not to say anything then. Though when the time comes, if you need me to, I will also speak with him. He will not do anything I dislike.
[He emphasizes the 'when' because this really isn't a secret that should be kept, especially from someone like Kevin who cared for him so much. It could only lead to increased resentment otherwise.]
[Kazuya flopped dramatically in his seat, though his worried expression wasn't exaggerated in the slightest. He was still scarred from the crowbar incident, okay? He was terrified of what the angel would try to do - even if it was him trying to exorcise him, Kaz knew that it would go horrifically wrong. For starters, Bel would try to tear the angel's face off for even trying, which would be, uh, bad]
I like Kevvy. He's nice for an angel. The moment he knows he's gonna hate me, or try to exorcise me. I don't know which one would be worse.
Or he'll completely flip out and try to crowbar my soul out again.
[Kaz's tone was wry, and he heaved out a sigh. He knew William spoke sense. One way or another, Kevin was going to find out. It was going to be worse if Kevin found out second hand, believing Kaz to be deceiving him, but... urgh... URGH]
But you're right. I should tell him. Eventually, at some point, maybe, probably.
Mmnn, those are the troublemaker demons who follow you around, right?
[Kazuya chewed on his thumbnail, remembering his meeting with Kevin in the swamp. He had a doll there he called Dantalion. The pervert that William was sweet on, or, something like that. Now, Kazuya was rather neutral regarding that, but the level of vicious violence and malice Kevin had shown towards the Dantalion doll...
...
Something in Kaz's soul whimpered]
Kevvy talked about Dandelion once. It was, uhm, kind of disturbingly terrifying. He had a doll, called it Dantalion and, er, was very graphic in how he was gonna kill him. Or, just maim. I don't know, I was kind of too scared to really ask about it...
[Imagine that level of viciousness directed towards himself? Ah... noooo...]
...maybe we should just keep it a secret forever. If he ever finds out, I'll just give him amnesia. Heavy concussions do that, right? Got a heavy flowerpot on hand?
[It's so stupidly juvenile, but William can't keep himself from snickering for a moment.
But that sounds troublesome, that Kevin is doing that.]
I'd keep in mind that he dislikes Dantalion for reasons that have nothing to do with being a demon. And as for Dantalion, some of that has to do with Solomon.
[Which he's not going to tell Kaz about, because hearing about Uriel's lifestyle of torturing men and killing their wives wouldn't do his poor friend any favors.]
No hitting him though. I need him mentally intact. He's the one who does most of the cooking and cleaning.
I'll cook and clean for you! Don't worry about it! I'm sure Kevin's skull is thick enough to prevent a serious injury anyway!
[But still, the flowerpot idea had risks. What if Kazuya didn't hit hard enough, and instead just increased Kevin's ire? Ah, it was too risky... hm... then...]
Ahh, this is hard... so, what if I... cast a Charm spell on him...?
[Sexy Gaze: a skill Kaz was too awkward to use except in the most desperate of situations]
...no Charm spells either. That would be highly inappropriate.
[And now he's remembering something from before he'd first met Kazuya. How secretive Kevin had been about knowing this guy. Not that William wanted to keep tabs on Kevin to that extent. But it had been so weird, especially when he'd found out that it was Kevin's Messiah. William had honestly assumed that maybe Kevin was dating this guy. Which wasn't that crazy a notion, right? After all, the devotion between an angel and God was kind of like that of romantic love right? And surely the Messiah would inspire the same.
Naturally he'd brushed that thought off once meeting Kazuya, because well, look at him. But now this idea about using a Charm spell...
No. Let's not go there brain. Not yet anyways.]
You could just Paralyze him and escape you know. That should be easy for you.
[Paralyse Eyes would make Kevin drop like a stone - oh, that was a thought! What about petrification?! Ah, no, he doubted William would appreciate Kevin being turned into a stone statue, even if it wore off by itself after a while. Sigh, it was just that...]
But Charm wouldn't make him mad, y'know? [Pause] Though, thinking on it, it'd be kinda creepy if I did Charm him. Kevvy's really, uh, intense, so, channelling his anger into lust...
[...
Yeah, thinking on it, maybe paralyse would be better. A Charmed Kevin would be, ugh, shudder!]
...I think my soul just shrivelled up a little just thinking about it. That's another mental image to brain bleach, ew...
[And at Kazuya's reaction, William dismisses his suspicions about his relationship with Kevin being less than platonic, because no one would react that way.
And it's a bit of a relief, because the two would be pretty mismatched.]
Yes, you do not want that. Solomon knew as much first hand about that particular problem of Kevin's...
[Honestly, the lust part was probably mixed in there as well, though that was something William wasn't going to bring up. Because it was hardly reassuring.]
Though, you know, I think he is still trying to figure it out. I mean demons and how to relate to them. It's just that he has, what is the word you'd use, "baggage" in that regard.
Baggage, huh? He must have enough to fill an entire warehouse, sheesh...
[Kazuya grimaced. Either way, he was still no closer to figuring out a plan in regards to the Kevin Issue. Or rather, a plan where Kevin will learn of his demon attributes, but not hate him with homicidal passion. Was there a way...?]
Hmm, I wonder if I should phrase it so I make it sound like I'm a demon only because of Abel's presence... like, play on his "I am possessed" assumption...
...wouldn't he just try to exorcise you though? Unless you manage to convince him your possession is a different kind?
[Yeah he feels like this conversation is going no where fast, because he cannot truly promise how Kevin will react.]
But, I want to believe he will not hate you, though I think it will be hard on him. But he does like you, and I would believe that would count for something.
[Granted, William might just be a little too desperate for things to workout. For Kevin to be the person Kevin believes he can be.]
...but I guess there's no point guessing how he'll react. [He chewed on his thumbnail] I'll tell him. I should, before he finds out himself, just, um... could I ask... [he hesitated] Can I tell him when you're there? I mean, like, as emotional support, not just as an anti-Kevin shield.
I... thanks. [Kaz felt genuinely touched at that, enough so that he suddenly felt a weird mix of self-consciousness and relieved happiness, his face a little warm] I know- I mean, you two are pretty close, so I was worried that, uh...
[Well, Kaz wouldn't want to cause awkwardness between William or Kevin - and he admitted it, there had been a smidgeon of worry that if Kevin kicked up big enough of a fuss about his true state, that William might have distanced himself from Kaz. Silly, he knew, but]
Never mind. I appreciate it, I really do. [Kaz had to duck his head slightly, his smile turning a little dopey. Minny, Hyou-Kyou and now William, all accepting him and sticking by him. Each time, it still made his stomach do a weird but pleasant swooping thing] Now let's hope Kevvy will have mercy...
I am rather used to him not liking some of the people who move in my circles.
[Kevin seemed to approve of Isaac, but that's likely because he was a normal human.
But as future politician, William needed to learn to balance such issues when it came to groups of friends. And if Kevin was going to stay by his side, the angel was going to need to learn those skills as well.]
Eh, I am sure he will be. He's the Angel of Repentance after all.
[Granted, Isaac's book had also said Uriel was a sadist, which he had not denied. But Kazuya really didn't need to know that.]
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I was thinking about it a lot recently. In my world, demons are not... viewed nicely. I mean, it makes sense. Almost all demons are violent, horrible creatures who deserve to die.
[Something dark flickered through Kaz's expression then, though it cleared quickly as he heaved a loud sigh]
So, I don't tell people because... you know, they... they get scared or, try to kill me, or something. So, it's easier to pretend that I'm human. But, recently, um, some people found out and they haven't... reacted badly? It's nice when people know and still like me, s-so, I've decided to be honest to my friends and tell them!
[He actually looked at William now, looking both horribly nervous yet determined. The cat was out of the bag! If William accepted him, then, Kazuya knew that he could be less wound up about his whole demon issue. That, maybe, when he got back home, there was a chance Yuzu and Atsuro would look at him without that slight trace of fear in their eyes, if he worked hard enough!]
I'm a demon and I'm sorry for lying! [He bent forwards in a deep bow of apology] Please forgive me!
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He could also remember the look on Dantalion's face whenever someone called him Nephilim with disgust. He could remember seeing through Solomon's eyes when he had first met Camio, rejected by everyone because of what he was.
Wasn't this the same in a way? And Kazuya had never wanted anything from him. To him Solomon was a nobody. But he also understood what it was like when people didn't see you either. He might very well be the only person William met whoever would understand.]
Very well, you are a demon then. I will admit, it fills me with no pleasure to find that out...
[Okay that was not a nice start, but he was coming up with something better.]
But, you are what you are. There is no helping that. And you haven't lied to me otherwise that I know of.
[Not about anything major anyways. Small lies were natural things.]
But, I will forgive you, providing you come in here and stop lurking near the window like a criminal.
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Uh, ah... yes, of course! Lurking, uh, I'll come in, then.
[He shuffled deeper into the apartment, almost tripping over his own feet. He practically flopped in the armchair opposite to William, and he was still looking at the human like he still couldn't quite believe what had just happened.
There was a thought that crawled into his mind, to say, "ah, but you haven't told him that demons in your world need to eat humans", but he squashed it flat. One thing at a time. He'll... tell him that later. Kazuya was going to be selfish for once, so... he wasn't going to sabotage himself again!]
T-Thank you, William. Like, it means... it means a lot to me, that you... [He fidgeted with his sleeve, giving a small, suspicious sniff] I'm glad we're still friends?
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[He looked at Kazuya as he draped on the couch, like some poor stray. The look being completed by the near tears.]
Even if I had been angry at you, that doesn't mean you would have stopped being my friend.
[He's forgiven worse. One just has to look at his relationship with Kevin and how it had changed. William hadn't even thought the two of them could still have a relationship after that reveal. And yet here they were, still together, their friendship stronger than ever.]
Besides, you have nothing to gain from being near me. That much I trust, because you are frankly a terrible liar.
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[Despite the somewhat sulky tone he took at that (true) comment about his lying skills, he was smiling. He felt like he was going to float off towards the stratosphere or something. Minny believed in him, William believed in him, Hyoubu believed in him... maybe retaining his humanity wasn't such an impossibility after all...]
I'm just too pure-hearted to lie, is all. It's morally wrong or... something like that. Yeah.
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[No one is too pure hearted to lie. But well that's the nature of the beast that is called humanity. Humanity, demons, angels and everything that had the mental capacitiy for moral reasoning.
But now wasn't the time to get philosophical in his head.]
...does Kevin know?
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[Kaz shuffled in his seat like a scolded schoolboy, twiddling his thumbs together at that question. Kevin... Kevin...]
Well, not exactly. [He looked uncomfortable] He knows there's something not quite... right, with me, but, he, um, doesn't know that I'm actually a demon. He thinks I'm possessed... which is half-true too, I guess, since Abel's still rocking about inside me. But, yeah. He doesn't fully know.
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[He knew how Kevin felt about demons. Even when it had been to save someone like Baphomet, he had balked. William had been forced to guilt him into it.]
I will make sure not to say anything then. Though when the time comes, if you need me to, I will also speak with him. He will not do anything I dislike.
[He emphasizes the 'when' because this really isn't a secret that should be kept, especially from someone like Kevin who cared for him so much. It could only lead to increased resentment otherwise.]
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[Kazuya flopped dramatically in his seat, though his worried expression wasn't exaggerated in the slightest. He was still scarred from the crowbar incident, okay? He was terrified of what the angel would try to do - even if it was him trying to exorcise him, Kaz knew that it would go horrifically wrong. For starters, Bel would try to tear the angel's face off for even trying, which would be, uh, bad]
I like Kevvy. He's nice for an angel. The moment he knows he's gonna hate me, or try to exorcise me. I don't know which one would be worse.
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[Not that he faulted Kazuya for being afraid. Kevin, or rather Uriel, was an intimidating person.
Okay that was putting it mildly. Angel of Cruelty indeed.]
But you know, you are different from the demons in our world. If a person can get him to think of it that way, he might accept you.
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[Kaz's tone was wry, and he heaved out a sigh. He knew William spoke sense. One way or another, Kevin was going to find out. It was going to be worse if Kevin found out second hand, believing Kaz to be deceiving him, but... urgh... URGH]
But you're right. I should tell him. Eventually, at some point, maybe, probably.
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[Okay, he and Kevin were going to have a conversation about this crowbarring. You couldn't go punishing all sinners like that.]
I will not push you on that regard. i just know how intense he can be. He is always fighting with Dantalion and Sytry, which is a bit annoying.
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[Kazuya chewed on his thumbnail, remembering his meeting with Kevin in the swamp. He had a doll there he called Dantalion. The pervert that William was sweet on, or, something like that. Now, Kazuya was rather neutral regarding that, but the level of vicious violence and malice Kevin had shown towards the Dantalion doll...
...
Something in Kaz's soul whimpered]
Kevvy talked about Dandelion once. It was, uhm, kind of disturbingly terrifying. He had a doll, called it Dantalion and, er, was very graphic in how he was gonna kill him. Or, just maim. I don't know, I was kind of too scared to really ask about it...
[Imagine that level of viciousness directed towards himself? Ah... noooo...]
...maybe we should just keep it a secret forever. If he ever finds out, I'll just give him amnesia. Heavy concussions do that, right? Got a heavy flowerpot on hand?
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[It's so stupidly juvenile, but William can't keep himself from snickering for a moment.
But that sounds troublesome, that Kevin is doing that.]
I'd keep in mind that he dislikes Dantalion for reasons that have nothing to do with being a demon. And as for Dantalion, some of that has to do with Solomon.
[Which he's not going to tell Kaz about, because hearing about Uriel's lifestyle of torturing men and killing their wives wouldn't do his poor friend any favors.]
No hitting him though. I need him mentally intact. He's the one who does most of the cooking and cleaning.
[The precious food...
His priorities are totally in tact though.]
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[But still, the flowerpot idea had risks. What if Kazuya didn't hit hard enough, and instead just increased Kevin's ire? Ah, it was too risky... hm... then...]
Ahh, this is hard... so, what if I... cast a Charm spell on him...?
[Sexy Gaze: a skill Kaz was too awkward to use except in the most desperate of situations]
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[And now he's remembering something from before he'd first met Kazuya. How secretive Kevin had been about knowing this guy. Not that William wanted to keep tabs on Kevin to that extent. But it had been so weird, especially when he'd found out that it was Kevin's Messiah. William had honestly assumed that maybe Kevin was dating this guy. Which wasn't that crazy a notion, right? After all, the devotion between an angel and God was kind of like that of romantic love right? And surely the Messiah would inspire the same.
Naturally he'd brushed that thought off once meeting Kazuya, because well, look at him. But now this idea about using a Charm spell...
No. Let's not go there brain. Not yet anyways.]
You could just Paralyze him and escape you know. That should be easy for you.
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[Paralyse Eyes would make Kevin drop like a stone - oh, that was a thought! What about petrification?! Ah, no, he doubted William would appreciate Kevin being turned into a stone statue, even if it wore off by itself after a while. Sigh, it was just that...]
But Charm wouldn't make him mad, y'know? [Pause] Though, thinking on it, it'd be kinda creepy if I did Charm him. Kevvy's really, uh, intense, so, channelling his anger into lust...
[...
Yeah, thinking on it, maybe paralyse would be better. A Charmed Kevin would be, ugh, shudder!]
...I think my soul just shrivelled up a little just thinking about it. That's another mental image to brain bleach, ew...
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And it's a bit of a relief, because the two would be pretty mismatched.]
Yes, you do not want that. Solomon knew as much first hand about that particular problem of Kevin's...
[Honestly, the lust part was probably mixed in there as well, though that was something William wasn't going to bring up. Because it was hardly reassuring.]
Though, you know, I think he is still trying to figure it out. I mean demons and how to relate to them. It's just that he has, what is the word you'd use, "baggage" in that regard.
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[Kazuya grimaced. Either way, he was still no closer to figuring out a plan in regards to the Kevin Issue. Or rather, a plan where Kevin will learn of his demon attributes, but not hate him with homicidal passion. Was there a way...?]
Hmm, I wonder if I should phrase it so I make it sound like I'm a demon only because of Abel's presence... like, play on his "I am possessed" assumption...
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[Yeah he feels like this conversation is going no where fast, because he cannot truly promise how Kevin will react.]
But, I want to believe he will not hate you, though I think it will be hard on him. But he does like you, and I would believe that would count for something.
[Granted, William might just be a little too desperate for things to workout. For Kevin to be the person Kevin believes he can be.]
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[Kazuya's voice was full of wry humour. It was just, realistically, these types of situations never went in his favour. Kaz was 100% certain Kevin might react by trying to flambé the soul out of his body]
...but I guess there's no point guessing how he'll react. [He chewed on his thumbnail] I'll tell him. I should, before he finds out himself, just, um... could I ask... [he hesitated] Can I tell him when you're there? I mean, like, as emotional support, not just as an anti-Kevin shield.
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Of course I will. It would be wrong of me not to offer when I have been urging you to tell him. Whatever his response, I will stick by you.
[Kevin will just have to deal.]
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I... thanks. [Kaz felt genuinely touched at that, enough so that he suddenly felt a weird mix of self-consciousness and relieved happiness, his face a little warm] I know- I mean, you two are pretty close, so I was worried that, uh...
[Well, Kaz wouldn't want to cause awkwardness between William or Kevin - and he admitted it, there had been a smidgeon of worry that if Kevin kicked up big enough of a fuss about his true state, that William might have distanced himself from Kaz. Silly, he knew, but]
Never mind. I appreciate it, I really do. [Kaz had to duck his head slightly, his smile turning a little dopey. Minny, Hyou-Kyou and now William, all accepting him and sticking by him. Each time, it still made his stomach do a weird but pleasant swooping thing] Now let's hope Kevvy will have mercy...
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[Kevin seemed to approve of Isaac, but that's likely because he was a normal human.
But as future politician, William needed to learn to balance such issues when it came to groups of friends. And if Kevin was going to stay by his side, the angel was going to need to learn those skills as well.]
Eh, I am sure he will be. He's the Angel of Repentance after all.
[Granted, Isaac's book had also said Uriel was a sadist, which he had not denied. But Kazuya really didn't need to know that.]